17 January 2010
The Virtuous Bad
Rogues, rascals and scallywags. Misunderstood trailblazers, or blight on society?
There seems to be a peculiar fascination with those who shirk what is considered "acceptable" conduct, the way a person "should" behave. Recently reading a book about the actor Jack Nicholson (one of my personal favourite "bad boys") I pondered why this is so. Do we live vicariously through them, a deep seeded desire to cast off the shackles that restrict our behaviours within boundaries we set ourselves?
For myself, I've never been a fully fledged member of the "bad boy" club. On the occasions I may have (in a fool exhibition of bravado and over-confidence) tried it, the result has been so transparent that all but the most naive of people saw through it. But, the funny thing is, getting along with these renegades has been something I've done very well. For example, when I first started working we had a client who was generally described by all as a "son of a bitch". A hard nosed businessman, he on several occasions conducted his activities in such a way that they bordered on the scam-like. If he could trick you into a difficult position for exploitation, he would do it. Perhaps it's because I have a somewhat suspicious and cynical mind, perhaps also it is because I realised at an early age that it is OK to say "No!" when I wasn't comfortable with something, we developed a respect for each other. Even at school, I never had problems with bullying, and even though I may not have been friends with them, I think I must have been seen as a non-threatening person, someone who will not provide any value in abusing.
One of the things that perhaps we all need to understand is that people are tricky creatures. They don't always share an attitude of common decency towards others that we perhaps believe they should. The answer is to study these interesting people, and accept them as one more shade of colour on the tapestry of experience that rolls out before us.
Failing that, call them an arsehole and suggest they sling their hook!
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Timely post. In my work I see Bad Boys cultivating their act from a young age. True badness is rare, and most rascality develops out of habit and insecurity. I myself have been a devotee of The Bastard, those blokes (and blokettes) who seep evil - but only when dark-eyed and dashing, of course. If you were as tall a child as you are an adult, it is unsurprising you weren't bullied. Also, not being disabled, foreign, Jewish, Asian, dark-skinned or a girl who wanted to play sports also contributed to your youthful immunity. I sense in The Son of a Bitch a respect derived from recognition of resilience: as one of the non-bullied, you rarely had to put on the Arsehold act. Chaps like SOB would've had to present toughly to the world of hard knocks from an early age. The question remains whether badness is naturally occurring, whereas my emphasis is on the potential we all have to go whichever way, depending on the pressures put upon us in the first years of life and at later significant turning points. Response to pressures and pleasures doth a meanie or meanderer make.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure it is a natural thing. I've seen friends from unstable homes grow up to be pillars of good manners and decency, while those from stable homes spend their days lashing out against the world. I struggle to get past the conclusion that we all make our personal choices and are responsible for them.
ReplyDeleteI was an early receiver of the teenage growth spurt. But it made me skinny and gangly. I do suppose I was luckier than many though.